“Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated.” — Lamartine
I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. If you were once connected with someone, does it make sense that the connection is broken just because of a physical death? No, the connection stays. You may just have to listen differently. You may just have to talk differently. The truth is that the connection is never broken. It’s quite impossible to break the most powerful connection in the universe. As long as you exist, the connection stays. Those we love don’t go away; they walk beside us every day. Unseen, unheard, but always near; still loved, still missed and very dear. They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories. We find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love. My mother is always in mind; forever in my heart. The life of the dead is placed in the heart of the living. Forever in this heart of mine, an everlasting bond, you’ll stay, until we meet again someday.
Saying goodbye to a loved one is the hardest thing to do, more so when such loved one has left this world to join the saints. Though I have no doubt in my mind that my darling mother is now resting comfortably in the Lord’s bosom, I still found it difficult talking about her using past tenses. As she will be committed to mother earth, it’s extremely difficult bringing myself to tell her goodbye because the reality of her demise is still like a distant dream to me.
The sorrow for the dead is the only sorrow from which we refuse to be divorced. Every other wound we seek to heal – every other affliction to forget: but these wounds we consider it a duty to keep open – this affliction we cherish and brood over in solitude
My very adorable ,writing this tribute was also the hardest task I have ever faced in life, for as days went by, I procrastinated, clutching on the non-existing hope that my mother’s death was a long nightmare from which I would soon wake up to see her in good health, embrace her and relate my bad dream to you.
As my mother will be laid to rest, the reality of her departure has not only hit me like a thunderbolt, it has also brought to the fore, the poet, John Dryden’s assertion that “All Human Things Are Subject to Decay, When Fate Summons, Monarchs Must Obey”. The import of this is that for every living creature of God, death is the inevitable end of physical human existence on earth. Mother, you indeed had no say in the matter (in your departure) for your creator summoned you and you simply obeyed.
Now, how do I begin to describe my mother? Hundred million words will not be enough and a million years will be too short to adequately describe her. But let me just state here that she was extra-ordinary woman, a woman like no other, a mother like no other. She is irreplaceable; no other woman can be her. My mother’s selflessness stood her out. Her strong root in Christ was her trademark. Her equanimity and calmness of spirit in the face of pains and difficulties were my mother’s elegant features. She was hardworking! I used to tell her; “What Christy Aleburu cannot do, Can never be done!”. I am sure if she lived long enough to buy a trailer, she would have driven it herself (at least before getting a driver).
It’s sad that my mother left this world when the share portfolio of her dividends has started to grow. We have all despaired at our loss over the past weeks and only the strength of the message she gave us through her years of giving has afforded us the strength to move forward. My mother was a good woman with good heart. She stood for truth and justice even in the face of provocations and this means that genuine goodness is a threat to those at the opposite end of the moral spectrum.
They say memories are golden
Well maybe that’s true
But I never wanted memories
I only wanted you.
A million times I’ve needed you
A million times I’ve cried
If love alone could have saved you
You never would have died.
In life I loved you dearly
In death I love you still
In my heart you hold a special place
No one could ever fill.
If tears could build a staircase
And heartache build a lane
I’d walk the path to heaven
And bring you back again.
To hear your voice, to see your smile
To sit and talk with you awhile
To be with you the same old way
Would be my fondest wish today
Mom you were an Angel here on earth
I learned so very much from you.
You were so gentle and so kind your
Smile would always see me through.
You taught me how to love unconditionally
And how to be my very best in all I do.
You gave your all to God and your family
Never once stopping to think about you.
I will like to end by thanking God for the mercies He has shown us at this dreadful time. Above all, we give thanks for the life of a woman I am so proud to be able to call my mother, the unique, the complex, the extraordinary and irreplaceable gem.
Goodbye my idol, good night, my heroin, fare ye well, my sweet mother, Mrs. Christy Edewede Aleburu (nee Otoide). Remember to send our love to grandma. A lot of us miss her terribly, but I know she’s in a better place where she won’t feel any more pain and where she’ll stay forever young. May God give her eternal rest and may her soul rest in peace. Amen.
“To have been loved so deeply even though the person who loved us is gone will give us some protection forever.” —J.K. Rowling
–Joel Oseiga Aleburu.